Friday, 1 April 2016

Coping With Autism Spectrum Disorder ( Not Very Well ATM)!



I know I wrote a post not long ago about how I've been battling depression and how I'm really trying to overcome it this time to say sane. Their has been another bump in the road and because I really need to let it all out to deal with it myself, I'm sharing my feelings about it all. I'm not using my sons full name, as I don't want him to accidentally come across it. When we are just trying to find out what it means ourselves. 

I've always known R is different, little ways he does, how he copes with change , how gentle but angry he can get. To me he will always be my little boy, but something changed huge last month. We have been seeing a pediatrician for the past five years so we knew there had been problems. R was officially diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder, we knew it was coming but it still hit me hard.  I've gone though every emotion since and I still haven't figured out what it all means. My heart feels heavy every time I look at him and I feel disappointed in myself. I don't know why I'm feeling this because two years ago, the pediatrician was ready to sign him off as he was hitting targets and even though there was underlining problems she didn't think it was serious. I knew in under 6 months he would be transferring from infants to juniors and it would be a big deal. My instinct was right and since things had got a lot worse. It didn't help that his teacher at the time was new and not very understanding towards him and I don't think she really got to know him before the damage had already been done.

R will take things literally to heart, so you really have to be wise with words as he wont understand how to take it which can be really hard. Simple things like sitting still for amount of time he will really struggle with. So simple tasks can be hard for him, to really grasp and understand and he just needs that little bit more patience from someone. The school have been fantastic and he has had extra support for the past few years. It's great they have supported us though this and always been there to back R up and support him. Now he has a diagnosis it has opened a whole new level of help for R.

Everyday is different and knowing that he has to live with this forever is heartbreaking. I know I have to listen that bit more, be patient that tiny bit extra & learn to live with my son having autism too. It's all still really raw and I know he wouldn't be R without the quirks he has. I've booked myself on to an Autism parents course, which I hope will help me understand this a bit more, so I can be the best and supporting parent I can be. 


2 comments:

  1. Just wanted to give you a big virtual hug, I think it's great that you are going to a course to learn all you can to support your son x

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  2. He'll always be your boy just the same sweets! I know it must be difficult right now coming to terms with the changes but things will get easier. Big hugs!

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